Stymied

The most horrible thing happened yesterday. Mom went away, and left us under the extremely watchful eye of Granny. Now, normally this would be a good thing. Granny likes to cuddle and gives us extra treats and serves me juice in my very own bowl so I don't have to share a glass like I do with Mom. But THIS time, Granny was up to no good.

It started out innocently enough. We had a leisurely breakfast and then some snuggle time, just like when Mom is home. But then Granny pulled out the big noisy sucky thing, and attacked our favorite hidey spots! First she moved the sofa and destroyed our carefully collected piles of poop. Then she went after our meticulously amassed mounds of shedding fur. Who would have guessed that the carpet is actually a deep maroon beneath the wads of fluffy white?

But then came the ultimate indignity. She TRICKED us into hopping up into our pen, then promptly locked us in, cackling with glee at her cleverness. And then she proceeded to violate our most sacred of spaces, UNDER THE BED. She did not stop with the vacuum, oh no. She brought out an even bigger, noisier monstrosity and began SCRUBBING our hideaway with SOAP and WATER.

Naturally we were concerned that she might need our assistance, and strove mightily to gnaw our way to freedom. No such luck. Granny left us there to languish while she finished her dastardly deed, and then moved on to the closet/litter box. Yes, you read that right. It's so much more convenient to just slip behind the stack of shoes when nature calls, instead of hiking up all those stairs to our pen. What could it hurt?

Granny didn't see it that way. Instead of being impressed with our ability to improvise, she groused about the "stench". Instead of marvelling at the sheer magnitude of our output, she muttered bad words under her breath about our "piggishness". It was completely insulting and uncalled for.

And after all that, she had the audacity to take a long hot shower in OUR bathroom. The NERVE!

We were sure that as soon as Mom came home and discovered our dilemma, she'd set Granny straight. We were wrong. Not only did Mom seem PLEASED about the invasion, she promised Granny that she would forevermore keep the closet door shut tight, and so far, she has. You couldn't slip a sheet of paper between mom and that door. Why, just this afternoon Kenzie made the arduous hike out from behind the sofa to do her business, only to be turned away. It was heartbreaking.